Money must grow on trees. Somewhere, in some tucked away valley in some remote corner of this world, there must be an entire orchard of Money Trees, where hundred dollar bills hang oh-so-delicately from dainty branches in the summer, and where cool winds cause gold coins to crisply jingle to the ground in the fall. That's the only way I can explain how The Hill and others can justify paying Dick Morris to opine on politics.

In case you missed it, convention week has shown us a new side of Dick Morris, Morris the Prophet.  This isn't your typical concern trolling, folks. No, with his columns this week, Morris transcends all levels of reality, peers past pesky things like facts and logic and stares straight into the future of our Democratic Party.  

First, Morris gave us a preview of Hillary's speech this week, writing in a Hill column entitled "The better Hillary does, the worse for Obama" that:

By not putting Hillary on his ticket and then giving her a primetime speech at the convention on Tuesday, Obama has the worst of both possible worlds. The better Hillary’s speech, the more people ask why she was passed over for vice president. This column is written before Mrs. Clinton spoke on Tuesday night, but she will not blow this opportunity to shine in front of a larger national audience than she has ever had. She will crisply articulate her programs and proposals and will come across as forceful, committed and energetic.

How very Ms. Cleo of Mr. Morris to divine that Hillary Clinton would focus on her agenda. Of course, Hillary's speech focused on the Democratic Party agenda as a whole, because, after all, this is the Democratic National Convention, not the Clinton National Convention (although Morris's mistake may be understandable, given the media's coverage of the event).

But wait! Morris isn't done flexing his mental abilities. Not only was he able to see into the future this week and tell us what Clinton would say, but he also turned his omnipotent mind's eye on the fairer sex and predicted this:

Women from coast to coast will watch her and wonder why she isn’t on the ticket [...] Obama has a huge problem with female voters [...] He didn’t help himself with these women by not choosing Hillary. Now, when Hillary spends all of Tuesday night showing what a grievous omission leaving her off the ticket really was, the electoral consequences for Obama are likely to be horrific.

Dick Morris: Taking the pulse of the female electorate by telepathically groping women, one voter at a time. By pulling a Mel Gibson and telling us What Women Want, Morris foresees "horrific" consequences for Obama, presumably because women "from coast to coast" will be so furious that Obama didn't pick a woman for VP that they will flock to a decidedly anti-woman candidate, or just stay at home altogether. And clearly, true prophecy springs forth from the mouth of Morris, as these numbers foretell:

Obama's lead among women is currently between 10 and 15 points, with McCain running 10 points behind George W. Bush in 2004 and 5 points behind Bush in 2000.

Horrific! Quick! Get me a flyswatter! I think I hear locusts coming!

It is not enough that Morris warns us of the coming cataclysms for our party, but today, in a column entitled "What's Up With Bill," he also pens a piece on Bill Clinton, disclosing exactly how the the former president will conduct himself in the months to come:

Bill Clinton’s strategy is to take refuge in his carefully cultivated reputation for being undisciplined and borderline-eccentric to drop bombs on Obama in such a way that Hillary can escape blame. [...]

Enter Bill. All through the primaries, he played the role of a negative Greek chorus, dropping attacks on Obama in opaque and eccentric language whose very vagueness permitted him to dance away from the blame for going negative when it suited him. [...]

Bill’s antics are the harbinger of how he will act throughout the whole campaign. In public he will support Obama while delivering remarks that, somehow, are always misunderstood!

A revelation so stunning, it merits an exclamation point!  

Perhaps Morris should adapt his prescient columns into a quatrain format, to be published in leather-bound volumes and preserved for posterity.  That way, one day, future generations can sit below a grove of Money Trees and read page after page of talent as real as the hundred-dollar bills providing shade above them.

Watching Joe Biden's speech, it got to me last night, how respectful everyone is being to John McCain.  He's always described as "a friend" or a "respected colleague" or a "hero.'  And finally it just got to me.  Jon McCain is no hero.

Follow me below the fold, as I explain in more detail how I came to my conclusion that John McCain doesn't deserve to be considered a hero.

(also posted at Booman Tribune)

Judging by the reaction of hundreds of bloggers watching Hillary's speech in The Big Tent Tuesday night, the verdict was unanimous...she absolutely nailed it. From her opening:

I'm here tonight as a proud mother, as a proud Democrat, as a proud Senator from the state of New York, as a proud American, and as a proud supporter of Barack Obama.

...to her line that needs to be made into an ad immediately:

It makes a lot of sense that next week John McCain and George Bush will be together in the Twin Cities, because these days they're awfully hard to tell apart.

...Hillary was on fire. She skewered John McCain, gave her unequivocal support to Barack Obama and she threw down the gauntlet to her supporters, declaring that nothing less than "the fate of our nation and the future of our children hang in the balance."

From start to finish, it was a powerful speech that left no question where her loyalty lies, what she expects from her supporters, and of course, what she thinks a John McCain presidency would mean. There was so much in her speech that is worth highlighting, but for me, this was the most powerful moment of the entire speech.

My mother was born before women could vote. But in this election my daughter got to vote for her mother for President.

This is the story of America. Of women and men who defy the odds and never give up.

How do we give this country back to them?

By following the example of a brave New Yorker , a woman who risked her life to shepherd slaves along the Underground Railroad.

And on that path to freedom, Harriett Tubman had one piece of advice.

If you hear the dogs, keep going.

If you see the torches in the woods, keep going.

If they're shouting after you, keep going.

Don't ever stop. Keep going.

My mother was born before women could vote. But in this election my
daughter got to vote for her mother for President.

This is the story of America. Of women and men who defy the odds and
never give up.

How do we give this country back to them?

By following the example of a brave New Yorker , a woman who risked
her life to shepherd slaves along the Underground Railroad.

And on that path to freedom, Harriett Tubman had one piece of advice.

If you hear the dogs, keep going.

If you see the torches in the woods, keep going.

If they're shouting after you, keep going.

Don't ever stop. Keep going.

If you want a taste of freedom, keep going.

Kudos to Hillary on a job well done.

Was she not GLORIOUS? Does she not do us PROUD? Is there any one of us who would not want her ALWAYS on our side?

OK, I admit to being a tad drunk on love for what happened tonight and so sorry for gushing all over dkos...

BUT DAMN IS SHE NOT HOT????

Honestly?  There was nothing else on T.V. and I just had it on for background noise.  I wasn't really that interested but there is something mildly amusing about hearing each state pump themselves full of hot air.  Plus, this was the roll call that was supposed to be a last chance for Hillary Clinton to sweep away the nomination at the last minute (in the fantasies of PUMA dead enders), or at a minimum honor her with an historic entry into the official minutes as a nominee with delegates counted.  Anyway, things were crawling along, with Obama slowly inching his way to the required total, and with Clinton picking up a fraction of his votes in most cases (really PUMA? This is what you had in mind?), when something extraordinary happened.

As I write this, I am listening to John Kerry's speech from tonight.  

"Are you kidding me folks?"

Wow - that was a great speech.

I'm sorry, but Pink Floyd's Echoes just kicked on to my Bose Stored system, (that's def as i get to upper-class, i own none homes, am struggling paycheck to paycheck w/ my partner.  it's great to read the Atlantic, my fave mag now, & see all the ads FOR WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO BE.)

i am NONE of those things.  i love great music, & am a picky beast re great sound.

THIS IS NOT THE POINT TO ARGUE, even those of us, trying to get by, recognize the importance of high quality reproduction of music to get us through our daily lives.

I am not being facetious.  In fact, I believe, that there are millions of Americans like me, REACHING   JUST out of their sphere,

I feel obligated and honored to post the following, even if it is otherwise considered too brief to be a typical diary entry.

I appreciate and applaud my Senator’s graceful actions to further the progressive cause of the American People in this critical election, and look forward to her energetic assistance to the Obama Administration in the years to come.

Excelsior,

John Adams
New York

These last two nights, the Clintons have done a fantastic job. With dignity, sincerity, and enthusiasm they declared their commitment to electing Barack Obama the next President of the United States. They were well-reasoned. They explained how Obama's policies were Clinton's policies, Obama's issues were Clinton's issues, and that anyone who supported Hillary for her vision for America would also support Barack Obama.

McCain's people went over Hillary's speech with a fine tooth comb and declared that she had "stopped short of saying he was ready to lead." As if this was her sneaky little revenge.

Then to make matters perfectly clear, Bill Clinton rebounded tonight and in top form declared repeatedly that Obama is ready to lead. He even reminded us (it's about time) that in his own candidacy Bill was criticized for being inexperienced, but that he was able to bring the Democrats to victory and change America for the better.

It is clear that the Clintons were not going to feed the PUMAs. So how do these dozens of enraged voters respond? I put on my gloves and surgical mask and went to their blog to find out.

This isn't much of a "diary," but Sens. Clinton & Biden gave me an idea. Last night Hillary said:

With an agenda like that, it makes sense that George Bush and John McCain will be together next week in the Twin Cities. Because these days they're awfully hard to tell apart.

Then tonight Biden literally got them confused! You can't make this stuff up.

So, to help out all the viewers next week, I'm sending these to St. Paul, MN:

Fellow Kossacks, tonight I feel something that I know many of you share. Pride. Tonight, I did not attend the convention, no media pundits asked my opinion, and I shook no famous hands. I sat, like you, and watched C-SPAN, and commented excitedly on liveblogs and speech discussions (I am, without a doubt, the most politically inclined of my friends). But I felt an electricity in the air nonetheless, a certain strength, the swelling sense of pride. Tonight, I was proud to be a Democrat.

Courtesy of Fark:

What can Hillary's body language tell us about how she really feels about Obama? It's not news it's CNN. Bonus: The comments are made of win

Are they ever!  Join the fun beyond the jump!

This diary started as a lengthy comment response to
CatM
but I was moved to blather on and on so here it is

Nearly everyone agrees Hillary Clinton gave the speech of her political life last night, magnanimously urging her diehard supporters to back Senator Obama for president. She emphasized what all democrats know: it is in their best interests and America's to see Barack Obama elected. As her reference to the Supreme Court suggests, a McCain presidency has negative long-term ramifications and will spiral America further downward.

Last night, Clinton earned figurative pats on the back for singing harmony. This is like praising the virtue of someone who kicked you in the head but was kind enough to give you an ice pack for the headache. Had it not been for Clinton's near-Rovian performance those last months of the primary, this disunity would be a background mumble rather than a ferocious roar reverberating daily in every media outlet.

Last night, following Hillary's wonderful speech, I wrote a diary with this very same title, noting that the one element that was unfortunately missing from Hillary's otherwise perfect speech was a full on endorsement of Obama's readiness and leadership ability.

Well, folks. Bill Clinton did it. And if this doesn't reassure Democrats, then nothing will. Bill and Hillary delivered a one-two punch.  Hillary set the stage. She urged her supporters to reject John McCain and support the party. Bill followed up by showing us why Obama is the one who needs to be President.

I'm not sure to what extent this was the plan. I suspect it was all along. Hillary and Bill would work together to reunite the party. And what an incredible job they did.

I think the most interesting thing about these last to nights is how effectively the Clintons united this party. Now, I think a lot of us Obama supporters were thinking, "boy, the Clintons really need to fix what they broke."

Alright I'm going to keep updating based on coverage for those of you who are watching CSPAN due to shitty pundits, but Bill just unequivocally stated that McCain blows monkey nuts, and Obama is oh so ready to be Commander in Chief. More to come. Not a Diary yet, but I wanted to get this in quickly.

This has to go up here too because it pissed me off so much:

  Update 5 or 6: Bullshit, Tom Brokaw just played McCain's POW card for    him. You have got to be kidding me.

I just watched Bill's address to the Democratic National Convention. Yeah, there were things I didn't like, but overall, he did what he needed to do. I don't doubt he didn't like some of what he did, but that's what makes him qualified for any number of jobs that I'd get fired from, just after lunch on my first day. The Big Dog's a pro.

And, of course, there were parts that I liked. "And second; I'm here to warm up the crowd for Joe Biden." Okay, so even if he's not totally happy, he can be funny. And, "the power of our example, than by the example of our power."; "Katrina and cronyism..." May G-d bless the Big Dog. "Thanks, but no thanks."

1939 - First flight of the Heinkel He 178, the first modern jet aircraft.

1962 - Mariner 2 unmanned space mission launched to Venus by America's NASA.

COINCIDENCE? I think NOT!

I would rather have peace in the world than be President.

--- Harry S. Truman

From the Church of Ineffable Stupidity:
(some games are rain delayed, today's sermon's pain delayed)